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  • Writer's pictureTina

Barnyard Royalty



Who knew having a flock of chickens could move one into the ranks of aristocracy? I’m calling myself barnyard royalty. Seriously, according to Facebook, and we all know Facebook is a reliable resource for all things important, if one owns a flock of chickens, one is now in the ranks of the wealthiest humans alive. Chickens are now worth their weight in gold. The eggs that they lay are like priceless gems. Who knew such highly coveted treasures would come from a chicken’s backside? The world we live in continues to leave me feeling confounded.


The past few years have been surreal. Human nature leaves me shaking my head and wondering what the world will be like for my bean. After the great toilet paper shortage, supply chain issues, concerns over rising gas prices, and now eggs being a hot commodity, I realize the human condition is a delicate thing. We are a spoiled, delicate bunch. We have become so conditioned to just going to the grocery store and picking up coffee from Columbia, bananas from Brazil, apples and oranges from the west coast, and seafood from who knows where; we’re soft.


Eric’s grandparents had a small plot of ground. I mean small, like what one would purchase with a house in a suburb small. They lived in a small community with neighbors pressed up against them. However, they remained self-sufficient. They planted a garden that sustained them for the year. His grandfather raised rabbits, a beef cow, chickens, and pigs. They knew how to make the most of the land they owned and used that land to provide for themselves and their family. They weren’t afraid of hard work.


Today, most families don’t grow a garden, let alone raise any animal for sustenance. In today’s society, driving a fancy car, taking several vacations a year, and purchasing the newest, latest, most expensive technology is more important; how times have changed. Instead of relying on ourselves and our land to provide for us, we rely upon unknown entities from all over the world. In the last few years, we have seen how delicate and dangerous this mindset can be for the mass population. People go into a tailspin over toilet paper. The world slows considerably when gas prices climb to five dollars a gallon or more. Rather than be saddled down with the care and responsibility of animals who provide for us, we plan our next vacation. Rather than sweat and work for our food, we jump in the car and drive to the store. Only to complain and feel cheated when the prices for staples we take for granted are higher than what is comfortable for us. We’re a soft, spoiled lot, indeed.


Over the summer, I reached out to friends, family, and neighbors for egg cartons. I offered free eggs in exchange for said cartons. I heard nothing; it was crickets. I had to purchase egg cartons at Tractor Supply. Now, my chick-a-roos have slowed in their egg production, egg prices are through the roof at the stores, and suddenly, I have a plethora of egg cartons. No one has come out and asked for eggs in exchange for cartons, but the expectation is there. Unfortunately, I don’t have the eggs to give away. I am getting an egg or two a week.


At a New Year’s Eve party, a gentleman inquired why I don’t put a light in my chicken coop to trick the chickens into laying eggs. I firmly believe each creature has a natural process that should always be respected. I mean, who wants to have a period every single day of their life until they die an early death? Certainly not me. I give my critters the respect and freedom to follow the natural order of things. I’m not smarter than The Creator; I’m not messing with His/Her process. That’s just my opinion.


Now, I will bask in the super status owning my own flock of chickens has created. Who knew all I had to do was own a flock of silly birds to be considered in the ranks of aristocracy? As one bib overall wearing wonder buns says, “It’s hard to be humble when you’ve got such awesome animals.” He’s mostly talking about his porcine princesses when he says this. However, now that being a chicken farmer is a status symbol, it’s going to be a challenge to stay grounded.


On this rainy day in January, stay safe, be smart, and perhaps rethink your priorities for the future; you too can be barnyard royalty with just a little land; dreams do come true, don’t let it go to your head, and keep washing your hands.

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