Doing Hard Things

What I feel I look like doing yoga...sigh...

We are all capable of doing hard things. Often, we underestimate our abilities, our commitment, and our strength. I am surprised with myself. I began week two of "The 21 Day Fix" on Monday. Upon sound advice, I joined Beach Body... thank you, Joann, for the sound advice. I wake up each morning, drink a cup of coffee, watch the weather report, and then spend thirty minutes rolling around on the floor like a turtle on its back, pumping 3lb—dumbbells, and sweating my literal ass off. I'm not going to lie; it is hard. I also feel foolish and a bit self-loathing at my limited ability. I am doing the "chubby, out of shape girl" remediations. I cannot hold a side plank for 60 seconds. I can't even get my body in the correct position to hold a side plank for two seconds, let alone lift my left while doing so. Sigh...

However, I am finding that I can do a little bit more each day as time goes on. Last week, I thought I would pass out when I crouched into position to do a mountain climber. I haven't done a mountain climber since I was Jordan's age. Although I still feel off-kilter, this week, I did several mountain climbers. It's not huge, but it's an improvement. What most surprises me is that I am continuing to do this. My commitment level for things like this just isn't that strong. I have a history of starting strong and committed and then getting discouraged and petering out. Every time the skinny, svelte superwoman on the video says, "Push Through the Pain!" I feel like kicking her in her svelte, spandex-wearing ass. However, anger has always been a good motivator for me, and I find myself pushing through it. The next thing I know, the thirty minutes is over, and I am done.

I am also finding that if I am going to sweat and work for thirty minutes, I don't want to ruin it by eating something bad...like a Cadbury Egg. Beach Body has destroyed my love of Cadbury Eggs. Thanks, Beach Body. Instead, I find myself grabbing water before I eat to make sure it's not my body telling me to hydrate. One's body does deceptive things. I am eating a lot of spinach and egg whites. I am cutting back on carbs, and I find myself using those ridiculously small containers to plan my meal. Seriously, no wonder I'm chunky; I eat a lot.

I don't own a scale. I hate scales; they're mean and tell me things I don't want to know. It is true; ignorance is bliss. However, my stomach feels smaller. My butt and legs feel a little tighter, and I think I may see a glimmer of a muscle. It could also be an optical illusion or wishful thinking. However, I feel accomplished, so I'm going with it. When the annoyingly svelte, spandex-clad woman on the video yells at me to remember my goal, I always pant in my head, yes, even my thoughts pant, I don't want to keel over, that's the goal, lady! Not dying is the damn goal! It's morbid, but it works. I feel like I am a little less likely to kick the bucket now that I am exercising.

We are all capable of doing hard things. It's true. I hope your hard things become a little less hard as time goes on. Look at all we've been through this year. You, too, can do hard things. As always, dear reader, stay safe, stay smart, try not to underestimate yourself, and wash your hands.