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My Chubby Trunks Boy


I have been walking each morning with my bib overall wearing buddy and my Heavy-B dog, whom Eric refers to as my “fat-ass dog.” My “fat-ass” dog has put on considerable weight in the last few years. Although I am in denial of his weight gain and defend him to the hilt against the rude comments made by The Bean and The Bibbed Wonder, I know but won’t admit my boy is a “chubby trunks.” Eric and Jordan refer to Buster as Fatty, Fat Boy, Lard-O, and Tubby. Jordan is especially rude about Buster and his robust physique. She’ll say things like, “Don’t give Buster a cookie! He’s going to out fat his skin!” She also points out that Buster has “grown a brisket.” The Bibbed Wonder laughs at my dear boy when he is jumping at the door to go outside. He says, “Oh, whose a fat boy that can’t get his front feet off the ground?” I tell them to stop talking bad about my boy. He’s not fat; he’s big-boned.


Although we go on our walk first thing in the morning, the heat and humidity have been brutal the last few days. Yesterday was the worst, and I was actually fearful my big-boned buddy would have a coronary. Eric was even concerned and stopped making fun of him after he lay in the middle of the floor, exhausted and panting. It took a half-hour or so, but he finally gained control of his breathing and napped most of the day. Although it is hard on him, exercise wears him out and makes him a better-behaved boy.


The B-dog and I went on our walk alone today. He did a much better job staying with me and appeared to take it a bit easier. Although he dashed into the high grass and disappeared among the trees for brief periods, he came when called and kept close to the path. This makes our walk a lot less stressful and more enjoyable. He did not appear to be on death’s door when we returned home, which was a relief.


It could be wishful thinking on my part, but I do believe my boy looks slimmer. I also feel like I look a little thinner. Walking helps my joints feel better, and it also clears my head. I’m sure walking has the same effect on Buster. The Bibbed Wonder Google Mapped the path; it is exactly one mile. We will continue with a one-mile walk next week but plan to make it two miles for two weeks and eventually walk five miles. That is my goal for the summer. I also plan to incorporate free weights three days a week. The Bibbed Wonder wants to get into shape and become buff before August. It’s so annoying; all he has to do is think about losing weight, and it falls off. I am sure he will be buff by the end of the month. The Heavy-B and I will continue to slog it out each morning, lie on the floor panting, and lose two pounds vs. The Bibbed Wonder’s twenty pounds. Life and metabolisms aren’t fair.


With the support of The Bibbed Wonder and sharing the experience with my favorite dog, I believe we are back on track to a healthier lifestyle. Although it may kill us, at least we’ll be together. Remember, dear reader, stay safe, be smart, don’t make fun of chubby pets; it isn’t nice, and keep washing your hands.



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