Man Blog Of March

The Maiden Voyage

There is big news at the Smay household this month. We have another driver in the family. Saturday, I took Jordan to get her driving permit. After what seemed like a lifetime waiting at the DMV for B325 to be called, she passed her written exam. With the weather in Pennsylvania being what it is, she didn’t want to drive the entire way home afterwards. Plus, we had to get a celebration breakfast in our bellies before we went home. However, at the halfway point and a visual on clear roads she took the wheel. She stayed on the road and watched her speed. I see no issues of driving in the future. It wasn’t that long ago when Jordan would mow the grass, every time the mower hit a bump, it would spit and sputter due to there not being enough Jordan to operate the safety shut off on the seat. She has had her fair share of being behind different wheels and levers, and I have faith she will be a good driver.

It never stops surprising me how very fast the years go by. I don’t feel like I am adult enough to have someone driving age call me dad. I have my share of old people aches and pains. Sleeping in without an early morning trip to the bathroom is a special treat that takes planning the night before. I now collect coupons for fast food that I never use. I grow white hair out of both of my ears. I despise the Disney channel. I would pick a night in over a night out most any night. I view any restaurant that doesn’t have hash on the breakfast menu as subpar. Besides that, I have come to the realization that I am a grownup.

During our visit to the DMV, I couldn’t help but think that the office was much bigger when I had to take my test. The whole process seemed like it was much more of a big deal back then. The folks behind the counter seemed like military type instructors. They all seemed to be counting down the days until retirement. The poor folks seem to have spent years in the movie Groundhog Day and can’t wait for it to end.

It is still odd to me that we are ending the era of saying, “Did you get your keys?” I don’t even know what we will say now. “Did you get your annoying little radio button thing that makes the car start if it is nearby and you hit the button in the car?” There is a beep from the car when you cross a line. The ageless advice from my teenage years of don’t do anything stupid, has been replaced with don’t make the car beep. There is probably an app or upgrade somewhere that records and sends notifications about all the beeps and issues when the car is in use. I feel bad that this group of kids has to go about their lives with constant monitoring. It is all they know and doesn’t seem invasive or unnatural. The freedom of driving has changed, and I am unsure if it is for the better. But these kids have gone their entire lives being connected. To live over an hour without a device is torture. On the first trip with Jordan driving, we made it a rule: the sound is off, and the phone goes in the glove box.

Even if I make it long enough to take grandkids or great-grandkids to get their driver’s permit, I will always be immature. I will always find it funny to announce, I am Vladimir Tootin after every single fart. I will always laugh watching a good kick to the groin video. Every morning I pass a Perkins, I will always announce that they are like Tinder for old people. I think more than enough products are on the market to fight aging. My secret weapon is not aging on the inside. After all, I was told what matters most is on the inside. I will also never stop using advice my parents gave me as a child, out of context for my own enjoyment. That’s right Tina, it doesn’t hurt to ask!

Until next month, be patient with slow moving drivers on the road. Feel free to announce you are Vladimir Tootin. Remember that getting old is a choice, for the most part. Stay safe and wash on.

Foodie Friday: Homeopathic Flu Remedies

Welcome to the last Friday of February, my dear reader. March first is the official meteorological first day of spring, and I welcome it with open arms. The Bean has been home from school with round two of Flu A all week. This one was a doozie; I haven't been this worried about my daughter since she was a toddler hospitalized with pneumonia. Although we saw the pediatrician on the first day of the infection and got Tamiflu to help shorten the time and lessen the severity of the illness, it was a miserable week.

Since we are still in the throes of flu season, I thought I would share a few things I do to help keep my child comfortable when she is sick with a cold or the flu. These practices do not replace a doctor's care; I am not claiming they cure the flu. They are simply small things that I do to comfort my child when she is miserable. If you or someone you love displays flu symptoms, I encourage you to see a doctor as soon as possible to ensure the illness does not exacerbate chronic conditions such as asthma.

Doctors tell us that drinking fluids is the most critical action during any illness. Our family is a water drinking family. I keep miniature cans of ginger ale and Sprite on hand in case someone has an upset stomach, but very rarely do we have anything in the house to drink besides water, coffee, and tea. When one of us is sick, I make a big pot of chicken noodle soup and keep it on hand for the duration of the illness. Soup is an easy way to include extra hydration for someone who doesn't feel like eating or drinking. It's warm, comforting, and provides essential nutrients the ailing body needs. I make a strong broth loaded with onions, celery, garlic, and thyme. Onions help clear the congestion, garlic boosts the immune system, and thyme adds flavor without salt. You can search my blog posts for my recipe for homemade chicken noodle soup if you don't have a favorite recipe.

Along with soup, I also advocate strong black tea. Black tea is a warming, gentle drink I crave when I don't feel well. I assume this is part of my English and Welsh heritage and that my parents were tea drinkers when I was a child. To me, tea is comfort. There is scientific proof that tea helps with illnesses. Tea contains antioxidants and anti-inflammatories that help the body fight infection. A nice mug of strong black tea with raw honey makes one feel better when one has a cold.

My little bean, who is not so little anymore, has developed a taste for pineapple. On Monday, after taking The Bean to the pediatrician, I went to the grocery store and picked up a fresh pineapple and pineapple juice for her to eat and drink. Pineapple is a good source for vitamin C and is believed to help thin mucus. I made The Bean a fresh pineapple drink with lemon juice, ginger, cinnamon, a touch of honey, and snuck in a bit of turmeric. I will share this recipe at the end of my post. It was a simple, delicious drink that seemed to thin the mucus, ease her coughing, and taste light and refreshing.

One last homeopathic remedy I will share with you is aromatherapy. I am a firm believer in natural practices in conjunction with traditional medicine. I make a deconstructed shower steamer when we suffer from congestion due to illness or allergies. You can purchase cute little shaped shower steamers with various aromatherapeutic qualities such as calming, invigorating, focusing, and clearing. However, if you don't have any on hand, you can create your own simple aromatherapeutic shower steamers right in your kitchen. I take a half cup of baking soda, add a tablespoon of citric acid, and a blend of rosemary, eucalyptus, and tea tree essential oils, usually a half teaspoon, I like it strong. I sprinkle this mixture on the bottom of my shower away from the direct water stream, and allow the steam and essential oils to open up passageways. It helps to clear the sinuses, and eases inflamed bronchial tubes. It also makes the whole house smell wonderful. You could add this blend to a steam diffuser or a few drops in bath water, which also helps. We also turn to water when we are sick. Nothing makes one feel better than a nice warm bath or a steamy hot shower when one doesn't feel well.

Hopefully, these practices will help you and your loved ones feel a little better if they are unlucky enough to catch this God-forsaken flu. I will close with the recipe for the pineapple drink I made for The Bean. I have found recipes that include garlic, and cayenne, but those ingredients are unacceptable to my bean. I hope you all stay healthy, but if you get sick, I hope this helps comfort you.

Pineapple Cold and Flu Drink

Ingredients:

-One fresh pineapple, peeled, and cubed

-3/4 Cup fresh ginger, peeled and sliced

-2 Lemons, peeled and seeded

-2 Tbls. Raw Honey

-1 tsp. Cinnamon

-1/4 tsp. Turmeric

Directions:

-Add all ingredients to a high-speed blender. Blend until pulverized and thick like a smoothie.

-Pour contents into a fine mesh sieve lined with cheesecloth over a bowl.

-Squeeze all the juice from the pulp.

-Pour the juice into a glass pitcher and refrigerate for at least two hours.

-Serve cold and frequently throughout the day.

The Bean said she felt this drink helped to thin her mucus and ease her cough. She drank almost the whole pitcher in one day. I would not keep this drink longer than forty-eight hours. It is a delicious and refreshing drink that helps keep one hydrated and hopefully, has some healing qualities. If nothing else, it is a tasty way to stay hydrated.

On this gray, overcast Friday, stay safe, be smart, use natural remedies in conjunction with traditional medicine, and keep washing your hands. Hand washing is the easiest practice to combat germs.

Odds and Ends

There is an element of waste in soap making. With each loaf we cut, two end pieces are irregular in size, not very pretty, and often lack decorative details. These end pieces are necessary to create nine beautiful, fully formed, well-shaped, and pretty bars. It's part of the process, and there is no way around it. The soap is still high-quality. It smells lovely, is colorful, and is the same quality as the more beautiful slices, but it isn't pretty.

What do we do with these end pieces, you may ask? Well, this is the soap I have to use. One bib overall-wearing dictator squawks like a chicken if he sees me walking to the drying rack with intention. "NO, NO, NO! You take the ends!" Yes, that is how I live. I am permitted to create pretty soap, but I'm not allowed to use it. My bathroom closet is filled with odds-and-end bits of soap bars of every scent, color, and creation. We also take the ends to Miller's Bulk Food Store in Smicksburg. The ladies who run the store put it out and sell it at a discount, and in exchange, we put that towards our cost for coconut oil and lard. It is a great system that works out well for all. A good product doesn't go to waste; the ladies earn a profit, and we put money toward staple ingredients.

With odds-and-ends being so popular at the bulk store, one bibbed, bald genius packaged an assortment of ends, weighed them, and placed a discounted price on them for our soap family to try. It's a great way to try many different scents, allowing one to sample a variety of soaps, and the cost is minimal. You see, dear reader, he isn't just the eye candy of the operation.

Today, those cute little sample packages are available on the website. The Bibbed Wonder packaged them in one-pound bags for your bathing pleasure. They are $15, and the mix is varied and comprises whatever soaps we have on the drying rack at the time. It is entirely random, which I feel is fun and exciting. It's like Christmas; you aren't sure what's inside the package. There may be soaps from our regular inventory, or you may get a sliver of soaps that have yet to be released. Surprise!

I proudly credit The Bibbed Wonder for this fun little endeavor. Check out the link below to explore this new option. On this grey, overcast last Thursday in February, stay safe, be smart, enjoy this new idea, and keep washing your hands.

One-Pound Sample Bags