Beginning To Let Go

As The Bean grows up and becomes more responsible, she is willing to take on a more significant role with our small family business. The Bean has been an integral part of our business since we began when she was seven. My outgoing, gregarious daughter is a natural salesperson. Where The Bibbed Wonder and I struggle with live shows and selling our products, The Bean naturally eases into the role. I admire this about her. She does indeed make me proud.

On March 29th, The Bibbed Wonder and The Bean will travel to the Butler Country Club to participate in the Soroptimist International's Spring Fling. Until now, we have been reluctant to participate in smaller shows because our time is focused on caring for the goats, farm responsibilities, soap duties, and our weekly farmer's market in Ligonier. There aren't enough hours in the day to accomplish what we need to do here and take on smaller shows. The Bean will get her driver's license in late summer, and she is willing to participate in smaller shows on her own once she has gotten her license.

On March 29th, she is doing a practice run with her dad. They will take Sue-B, my affectionate name for my new Subaru Forester, drive to Butler, set up for the show, peddle our wares for four hours, tear down our display, repack Sue-B, and drive back home. Eric insists that Jordan does everything; he will merely attend to lend a helping hand if needed. Once The Bean is comfortable with the process, has her driver's license, and we feel comfortable with her going on her own, we will allow her to pick and choose the shows she wants to participate in, and then her earnings will be half of what she sells. Knowing my daughter, with the opportunity to earn more by selling more, she will knock sales out of the park. She is financially motivated.

I view this agreement in a mostly positive light. However, I am very apprehensive about my baby driving some distance to participate in shows by herself. I know she is capable, competent, and has a good head on her shoulders. She has been a miniature professional since age seven, but the thoughts of her going alone fill me with worry. I have seen with my own eyes the way men prey on young girls who are alone at these shows. When we went to the Murrysville Farmer's Market, one vendor in particular would circle around the young female vendors who were alone like a vulture. These young girls are sitting ducks, can't leave their booth, and are often too intimidated or embarrassed to put these lechers in their place. It was infuriating to watch. It reached the point that The Bibbed Wonder or I would go over and stand with the young woman when we saw the lecher standing at her booth.

When I first started attending The Ligonier Country Market, I had a few uncomfortable encounters, mostly with older men. These men seem to become emboldened when they see a woman alone. I have never had an issue when Eric is with me, and I appreciate his support in attending live shows. However, thinking about Jordan attending a live show without us causes me great concern. I am sure she can convince one of her friends or Pook-A-Dook to attend them with her. These are all things we can figure out as we go. With her background in Tae-Kwon-Do, her surly attitude, ability to give withering looks, and confidence to speak her mind, I know she will be okay. It's just the thought of some lecher preying on my baby that causes me great stress.

Despite my concerns, I am excited about the opportunity for her to participate in these shows. I think she will gain confidence, build her character, encourage her to be more responsible, and gain invaluable experience. She is an asset to our company, and I can't wait to see what she can do with this opportunity. It's just letting my favorite little human go out into the world alone that causes me anxiety. I must take baby steps to become more comfortable with her independence. This summer we will begin looking at colleges, and wrapping my mind around her going away to school also causes me great anxiety. Like it or not, my baby is growing up. I want to encourage her to dream big, follow her heart, and do everything she wants to do in life. I never want to be the parent that holds her back or tries to control her, but letting go is hard.

On this beautiful spring day, stay safe, be smart, encourage young people to be independent, believe in their abilities, be there for them, and take baby steps in letting go. If you need to be their champion or protector, step up, even if they aren't your child, and keep washing your hands.